The Jabberwock

LESSON 1: ACTION

“You can’t go into contact with the Walkers without equipment. Worst case scenario, you get your brains chewed out. Best case? You don’t forget, and you keep yourself armed.”

The sound of bullets ricocheting against the empty bottles resonates in the training grounds. Zi-Kai’s heart skips a beat, yet Guillermo is as still as a statue. “You see that? That’s the bullet of a man who’s calm, collected, and a damn good shooter. Obviously, we wouldn’t want you to handle the heavy-set arms, so…” Guillermo trails off his sentence with a toy superhero. “Take this.”

Zi-Kai wasn’t naturally inclined towards violence. Ever since the outbreak started (or rather, progressed, because nobody actually knows how it even began. A science experiment, maybe?), his days were spent hiding alongside Siobhán, watching the actual adults take in the action, simply living off of luck, prayers, and a decent cache of bullets and melee weapons. Given his youth, Guillermo was pressured into training Zi-Kai; in a world where hell has manifested itself, you’ll need all the soldiers you can get.

“The hell’s wrong with you, boy? Just hit the thing against that bottle. Can’t be that hard.” Guillermo directed his stub towards the target.

Ⓨ This isn’t right.

Zi-Kai lowered the action figure with a solemn look on his face. He couldn’t bear to hold, much less look at it, knowing its true intent. “I don’t wanna. I don’t wanna be an adult yet. It’s just not the right thing to do.” His voice reduced to a whisper.

Conversely, Guillermo stared a million daggers into Zi-Kai. “We allow you to be of some use to our group, and all you can do is whine like a baby? Tellin’ me about the ‘right thing’? When will you ever give up on your morals? This whole world has gone to hell, and that ain’t right either! Tell ya this: if you learn this one thing, you’ll never be afraid to hold another weapon again. Isn’t that what you wanna be when—if you grow up? Fearless?”

This left Zi-Kai silent. Now, none of what Guillermo said was wrong, really. Yet despite that obvious fact, it still didn’t sit right with Zi-Kai. One would’ve thought a man missing his left hand would have less guts than a fully-limbed one. 

Nevertheless, he got into position and leveled the figure towards the empty bottle that was taunting the boy right in front of him. He held the action figure low and level with his torso, a sloppy yet firm stance.

“Well?” Zi-Kai inquired.

“Well, what?”

“Am I doing it right?”

“Tch, you’re asking me. You haven’t done anything.” Guillermo pointed towards the bottle.

“I haven’t?” 

Zi-Kai’s obliviousness prompted the boy to flail the action figure back and forth, somehow just barely hitting the bottle right in front of him. The clinks echoing in the training grounds mocked the boy’s poor performance.

“Well? Did I do it?”

Guillermo said nothing and exited the grounds into the foliage. His lack of communication told Zi-Kai more than enough—and somehow made the boy feel worse than when he arrived.

LESSON 2: NURSING

Unlike his previous lecture, Zi-Kai was particularly eager to learn how to treat his fellow teammates. Knowing his friend Siobhán, she wouldn’t try to push anything on him or anything. After all, they usually only exchange about one or two words with one another, and Siobhán was always busy patching up one person or another.

In a secluded area near a stillwater lake, Siobhán had with her a red medkit with questionable stains and broken plastic. “How come we got the ugly medkit? There are more in the kitchen that’re less broken.” Zi-Kai opened the kit for a wet band-aid. Its repulsive smell compelled him to toss it into the lake.

“I-I just thought you’d understand this kiddy one a little bit better than the materials we have right now… besides, if it were up to me, we wouldn’t be using this one.” Siobhán scrambled through the kit for an instruction manual. It seems even she has quite a bit of catching up to do herself.

“I’m not as dumb as I look,” the boy claimed, bearing a small needle in his hand. “See! You use this thingie for stitching up wounds, I think.”

“You’re totally right—it does. It’s pretty cool too. Well, to me, I mean.”

Ⓐ Can we save Guillermo?

“Does that mean that we can stitch back Guillermo’s left hand again if we find it? Pleeeeeease?”

The question made Siobhán freeze. She had almost completely forgotten about Guillermo’s missing arm and Zi-Kai’s willingness to attach it back. Such a feat would be impossible in this day and age. Not now. “Maybe not in this world.” She finally replied.

“This world? You mean like a planet?”

Siobhán giggled under her breath. “No, silly. Like… when the outbreak ends.”

“Hmm.” Zi-Kai’s eye caught sight of a bottle of hydrogen peroxide. The clear liquid sloshed in its confines.

Ⓨ Drink it

Zi-Kai opens the bottle; its pungent, acidic odor pools out of its container. He brought the liquid to his lips, and before the compound could touch his tongue, Siobhán took the bottle from Zi-Kai in an instant. “Hey, don’t drink it! It tastes awful.”

“What are we supposed to do with it if it looks like water but we can’t drink it, then?”

“Good question,” Siobhán said, standing up and rolling a large log towards Zi-Kai before sitting back down next to him. “You know, when people get hurt and all by a gunshot or whatever, they always have to rely on the doctor or nurse to get patched up and all.”

Could she possibly be more obvious?

Siobhán squeezes a bottle of bright red ketchup on the log. “And when that happens, you gotta clean up the blood first.” She wipes the “blood” with her pink sweater. “but you could also get sick first, so that’s why you gotta use this peroxide to prevent the chance of infection and losing some of our soldiers. Got it?”

Siobhán poured a fair amount of hydrogen peroxide on the log. She did it in a way that, to Zi-Kai, almost felt as if she were being clumsy herself. Then, she set the used bottle to the side and squeezed more of the ketchup onto the log. “You do it yourself.”

Zi-Kai nodded and, instead of using his sleeve, found an unusually large leaf and cleaned the “blood” vehemently as he held the once put-away peroxide to the side. Only, when he was wiping the “blood”, his palm scraped along a long, pointed splinter that formed into a thin red line of blood that would soon emerge into a… considerable accident.

Long story short, Siobhán would accidentally knock the peroxide into Zi-Kai, only leading to even more sharp pain, and it simply took the help of another person—namely, Pedro— to alleviate the situation. Having been patched up, Zi-Kai would forgive Siobhán’s millions of apologies even after the damage had been done.

BREAKTIME

Now with both a broken spirit and a patched-up left hand, Zi-Kai was more than ready to take a break from this madness. No matter how many times Siobhán tried to stop the damn training already, finally, none of the adults were willing to listen to her pitiful pleas. Some thought she was taking this incident too seriously, even though it wasn’t entirely her fault that it occurred.

For lunch, it was the same old, same old—baked beans. Zi-Kai was particularly glad he sat inside the cabin to eat; he couldn’t bear being outside after his last lesson, but forage was inevitable—Zi-Kai needed to suck it up. After all, the others have surely experienced worse.

The cabin door creaked open. Zi-Kai’s injured hand tensed up only to see that it was just Zuly who walked in holding an extra can of beans. As she sat down, no words were exchanged between the two of them for the time being. She handed the can of beans to him, which Zi-Kai willingly accepted, though it’s likely he wouldn’t actually eat it.

“So? How’re the beans?”

Ⓧ …

Zi-Kai stays silent.

“Okay, I get it. You’re pissed after what happened earlier. Can’t say I’m really surprised by Siobhán, either. Still probably apologizing to Pedro. But this stuff happens all the time in the outbreak.” There was a hint of passive-aggressiveness in her voice.

“And is that supposed to make me feel better?”

“No, it’s—” she stopped herself to take a deep breath. “I don’t know what I’m saying. Sorry. But you’re with me next, so try and cheer up a little, okay? I promise I won’t go too hard on you, I promise.”

Before Zuly could say more, a series of knocks emerged from the other side. The door creaked open again, and it was Siobhán.

“Can I–”

“I was just finished.”

Zuly pushed Siobhán out of her way and exited without haste. Siobhán sat on a wooden, flimsy stool. “Remember what I told you about us fixing Guillermo’s hand after the outbreak ends? Well, I believe it can. Someday.”

Her statement finally caught Zi-Kai’s attention. It was as if their previous encounter was pushed to the side and even forgotten altogether. “There’s no way that can happen.”

“No, you’re wrong! You know how there’s been like World Wars and Ice Ages and stuff? Well, those were just phases of the Earth, you get me? Those wars and those ages were bound to happen, and they both stopped, so if my logic is correct, we’re just living in another phase that has to end some day…”

While the hope of the Walkers’ eventual extinction was a slim one, if Siobhán’s account was accurate, Zi-Kai secretly longed for this nightmare to finally conclude.

Ⓨ If only.

“Yeah, if only.” Zi-Kai’s eyes trailed down to his injury. Imagine being born in a world without the Walkers. He wouldn’t have any injuries. Guillermo would still have his hands back. His parents would still be alive. “How much time until breaktime is over?”

“Just about now, actually.” Siobhán was just about ready to leave. Zi-Kai followed her footsteps after he finished his beans and exited the cabin for his next lesson. He barely touched the beans Zuly brought him earlier.

FORAGE WITH ZULMA AND PEDRO

Zuly was Zi-Kai’s first interaction within the survival group. If it’s anyone he trusts, it has to be Zuly. Despite being born to a criminal, Zander Papadopoulos, Zuly shows no such traits of her despicable late father. No one, not even Siobhán, wanted to take the boy in until Zuly insisted on it. Siobhán was the first to comply; Guillermo was the last. Pedro was likewise to Zuly’s behavior, though he viewed Zi-Kai simply as puerile and nothing more.

The three of them scavenged like vultures outside campgrounds. Pedro agreed to search near a pond, while the other two looked everywhere else.

“Have you seen anything yet?” Zuly asked him.

Zi-Kai held a rusty can. “I found a can of rotten peaches.”

“Anything useful?

“Nothing. No, wait—I see some bugs. We can eat them, can we?” He reached his fingers for a soft pill bug trailing along a couple of dead leaves.

“We’re survivors, not barbarians, Zi-Kai. At least keep some of your dignity, for Chrissake.” Zuly slapped the bug out of his hands and ordered him to continue his search.

The sounds of groaning are discernible from not too far away from the woods. Behind a tree, a walker roams on the leaves, seemingly not aware of the presence of Zuly and Zi-Kai. “Let’s go, Zi.” Zuly finally said.

The two stumbled across a cabin similar to their own. What once had rich color began to deteriorate and become dry, but the structure appeared much more stable. “How nice. Do you think we could move in here when another horde approaches us?”

Ⓐ “When?”

“When?” Zi-Kai asked with a raised eyebrow and an unopened chocolate bar he found on the way. “You mean they’re coming now? Like right now?”

Zuly chuckled under her breath at the misunderstanding. “No. It’ll be coming soon, but not at this moment. It’s gonna happen, that’s what I know. How could it not? I mean—look around us.” As if the miscommunication continued, Zi-Kai jerked his head left and right, attempting to see the horde before Zuly did. “I don’t see anything.”

Then abruptly, as if it appeared out of thin air, a bundle of four or five fish fumbled at his aged shoes, Zi-Kai sinking to the floor after the scare

“Hey! What the hell’s the matter with you?” The woman picked up the fish in her right hand as she helped Zi-Kai up with her left. Pedro was apathetic to the jumpscare.

“Sorry. I, uh, got fish.” The deep voice of the man was compressing Zi-Kai against the forest floor. “What else do we need again?”

“So we got fish, check. All we need are some ammo, first aid if possible, an axe, a few radios, and some liquor.”

“Liquor? What for?”

“Hell if I know. Guillermo just told me to.”

Zi-Kai was now pulling at the hem of Zuly’s blue pullover. “Are we gonna go inside or not?” Zuly and Pedro proceed towards the cabin with Zi-Kai at their side. Pedro struggles with the doorknob and calls it quits.

“It’s locked, boy. We cannot go in.”

Zuly, however, kicked the door open with her heavy-set Timberland boots. “Look at that; it’s open.” She enters the cabin, and Pedro—with muttering insults under his breath—and Zi-Kai trail behind.

The cabin from the side was devoid of functional materials—at least, from a glance. Zuly commands Pedro to go to the bathroom while she herself searches the kitchen. Zi-Kai was not given a direct command—only to stay out of their way and not touch anything. Yet he follows Pedro into the bathroom.

“Um, Pedro?” His voice was shaking.

“What is it? Didn’t Zuly tell you to leave us be?”

“S-sorry, but I have a question. Since you’re a scientist and all.”

“Erstwhile scientist. Labels such as those do not matter in this world.” Pedro didn’t take his hands away from his work.

Zi-Kai was unmoving at his statement. “Um, okay. Well, anyway, I remember this conversation with Siobhán I had during breaktime. She said that someday and somehow, this world won’t be so messy with the zombies, and we can live in peace. Kind of like an Ice Age or a war.”

Finally, Pedro halted his search. His usually stern face softened into a feeling of sorrow to regain what he had in his past life. “If only. I could have my wife back and my job. You could’ve learned more about your parents. But that’s impossible. This situation is beyond even my understanding, and the understanding of it all matters none. Survival does. I recommend you refrain from listening to that air-headed girl, okay?”

Zi-Kai nodded his head solemnly and allowed Pedro to continue his work. Shortly after, a yell came from the kitchen. “Hey, boys!” Zuly’s voice drew Zi-Kai to the origin as if he were a magnet. Pedro, not so extensively, though he went nonetheless.

“Check it out—it’s a full goddamn house!” The box of canned goods caught their eyes. It was endless: beans, tuna, salmon, corn, chicken, Zi-Kai could’ve made a five-page essay containing the varied amounts of food they had.

“You’ve outdone yourself this time, Zuly.” Not a trace of disappointment was on Pedro’s face anymore. This, too, gave a glimmer of hope to Zi-Kai that maybe things weren’t so bad in this world. The first step was food—materials shouldn’t be hard to come by.

END OF DAY 1

Dinner was a hearty appetite. Everyone was set up at the old patio table outside (which was also often referred to as the “dinner table”) with Zuly and Zi-Kai sitting together, Guillermo across the two with Siobhán and Pedro next to him, and Matt on the far side of the table with nothing to eat but an apple.

“I don’t think I’ve eaten this much in a while! How’d you guys get this?” Guillermo waved his stub in excitement. “Did Zuly end up badass-ing some thieves around here?”

Pedro even seemed content with it. “We just got lucky, is all. But I’m very grateful for it, too. It’s a shame we only have canned foods…” Siobhán and Zi-Kai shook their heads simultaneously in agreement. Matt said and did nothing. This gave Guillermo a chance to mock the man.

“Hey, old man! What’s up with you and being so damn secluded all the time?”

Matt said nothing. The cacophony of chatter ceased.

“I’m talking to you, geezer! You gotta problem with us? You wanna duke it out?”

Matt said nothing.

Guillermo suddenly stood up. “What’s the matter with you, man? I’ll get over there and teach ya a thing or two about—” His sentence was left incomplete with a heavy boot kicking his shin. “OW! Come on, what’s up with you? I’m not actually hitting the guy, am I?”

“We have kids at the table.” Her finger gestured to Zi-Kai and Siobhán.

“You know, Zuly, sometimes you can be too nice. Why do we bother bringing this burden with us?”

Matt’s face was obscured by his long blonde hair, but from an angle, Zi-Kai noticed a hint of melancholy. Was he generally like that, or only after Guillermo’s insult?

“Mister?” Zi-Kai said. silently.

“Welp. I’m gonna hit the hay. Thanks for the food.” One by one, the survivors left the dinner table. All except Matt. It was getting dark out, and after a few minutes had passed, Zi-Kai could barely see his own hands in front of him.

“Zi-Kai, get to bed.” Once Zuly ordered it, Zi-Kai did not hesitate. But his slumber wouldn’t last very long.

MIDNIGHT

While everybody else was sleeping, Zi-Kai woke himself up in the dead of the night. He scurried towards the patio and saw Matt sitting there in the same position as last night. He was awake, which led Zi-Kai to think that right now was the perfect opportunity to question him as soon as he sat next to the man.

Ⓑ Are you really scary?

“Mister,” Zi-Kai’s voice was trembling. “Are you really as bad as Guillermo says you are?”

The dynamic shifted; Matt began speaking to Zi-Kai without the tension from the night prior. “You see a scary old man, and your first instinct is to talk amicably. I don’t understand you.”

“You might think I’m like the other ones, but I’m not. I’m brave.”

“Did that witch tell you that?” Matt was tying his hair up into a low ponytail. His facial features were much more visible even at night—his face was riddled with bruises and facial hair.

“U-um… no, but I—”

“It’s time you live by your own terms. Maybe Siobhán will remain a little longer—that girl doesn’t know a thing about first aid—but when Zulma, Guillermo, and Pedro die, who will you rely on? You’ll be dependent, and it’s only a matter a time before they get to you, too because not everyone here is very trusting. We should be human against Walker, not human against human.” The apparent scars across Matt’s face made Zi-Kai reluctant to reply. 

Ⓨ How would you know that?

“And how would you know? You’ve always been a prisoner day one since we came here.”

“We go back. I’m not as senile as you think. But you are more than welcome to take my advice with a grain of salt. I don’t have a say in anything. That was made clear those many months ago.” Matt remained silent afterwards.

Zi-Kai faced a difficult dilemma. While Matt possessed experience and knowledge in “Survival 101,” Zuly had been one of his first companions. Her word was law; he would follow her instructions without hesitation. Unable to reach a decision, Zi-Kai postponed his final verdict, opting instead to sleep on it.

The next morning came and Matt was gone. A trace relating to the man was nowhere to be found, and Zi-Kai never talked to him again.